Bill Cipher In: Of Triangles And Demons is the first episode of first season of the Bill Cipher Show.

Transcript Edit

Act I Edit

The camera shows Bill Cipher sitting in Stan's sofa in the Mystery Shack.

Bill: Hey kids, It's Bill! Y'know, the interdimensional dorito demon from the Disney animated series - "Gravity Falls." Well, guess what? I just got my own show after killing the executives of Walt Disney Animation and you're just tuning into the first episode - better than that show of Shooting Star's and Pine Tree's!

Bill picks up the telephone as it started to ring loudly.

Bill: Hello? Name's Bill Cipher, but you can call me your new lord and master for this moment right now! Yeah? Pizza? Why not? Come in 30 or else I'll burn you down to ashes!

The doorbell rings as Bill opens the door to encounter by none other than, 8 Ball holding a thi box with the words Pizza written in currents.

8 Ball: Sir? Your order! And please, don't forget to leave some cash!

Bill snatches the pizza and burns him down.

Bill: Here's what you get for asking the great Cipher for cash as he holds none.

Suddenly, Dipper breaks in the room.

Dipper: But Bill, weren't you based on the Eye of Providence? Y'know, the eye of God? Which itself cash or, should I say Bill?

Bill was shocked to hear his words, but confused.

Bill: Hey, Pinetree, what do ya mean by based on? Was I created by someone?

Dipper: Well, probably. Alex Hirsch created the world of Gravity Falls? And he himself created by God, meaning the Eye of the Providence!

Bill: Well, I guess it's time to meet the creator, Hirsch! Even though I don't have any nicknames to call him, I'll probably make one!

Bill drops the pizza and disappears as Dipper picked it up and started eating.

Dipper: Huh, neat.

Bill Ciphers entes Piedmont, California at the house Alex Hirsch.

Bill: Oh, so this is where Shooting Star and Pine Tree lives.

Bill comes a across a sign board.

Bill: Let's see the name, Piedmont, California! And that, I guess, is the house of Hirsch.

Bill enters a random house to see a married couple sleeping in their beds.

Bill: Prepare to die, Hirsch!

The two scream as they encounter Bill.

Guy: I'm not Alex Hirsch!

Girl: Neither me!

He erases the two from existence and encounters their living baby pooping.

Bill: Eeew! Well, my job's done! Now to get out of the real world!

Bill Cipher went back and saw Dipper.

Bill: Hey, Pinetree! Move ahead!

Dipper: Uh, Bill! I just have to tell you that you're an idiot. That guy was Alex Hirsch and I'm didn't kill him or Gravity Falls would be entirely destroyed. And yeah, you were so close to ruling the real world instead of our fictional one.

Bill was shocked, but didn't reply.

Dipper: Uh, Bill?

Bill erases Dipper from the existence.

Dipper: Gah!

Bill: Well, now to eat my pizza!

Bill opens the box and finds it empty and became angry.

Bill: I'll get you, Pinetree! In fact, I already did!

The scene cuts to Dipper in heaven.

Councillor: Not allowed in heaven! A boy who have been possessed by a demon once!

The Councillor kicks Dipper to Hell where the Devil was waiting eagerly for him.

Devil: Another one kicked out of heaven, eh?

Dipper: Pretty much, yeah.

Dipper stood up gently as the first short ends.

Act II Edit

The camera shows Bill Cipher partying with his friends in the middle of the Mindscape.

Bill: Hi kids! Bill here, y'see me and my dork friends partying for the success of my first released short you just saw there!

Bill pulls out a DVD with a picture of him from nowhere.

Bill: In fact, it was so successful that the first short came out in a fake "Gravity Falls" DVD! See it for yourself!

Bill destroys the DVD and sits on a chair made of humans turned to rocks, similar to that one of "Take Back the Falls" as he picks up a cup of tea and started pouring it to his non-existent mouth.

Bill: So, we would like to show you this deleted video about me singing a song. Where can I get it? Of course, it's Internet, you dummy? It's just funny how dumb you are!

Bill takes out a computer and searches through the Internet.

Bill: Here it is! Oh, how beautiful I sing! Oh, if you want to hear, then I guess you can't since all you have to do is search "It's Gonna Get Weird By Bill Cipher" and tag! You're it!

Bill burns the computer as he continues to party as Ford accidentally breaks into the Mindscape.

Ford: Oops! Wrong time!

Bill: Hey look! It's back scratcher! Haha! Who's ready to back scratch, Scratcher?

Bill turns Ford into stone and scratches himself ending the episode.

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